Wine after whiskey.

Here we are, waiting for AF to show so I can get this show on the road!  So frustrating, my chart was BEAUTIFUL this month!  Triphasic, dip around implantation time...  Alas, once again no, 2 lines will never be on one of those stupid tests.  I even bought another brand because surely the ones that I'm using are faulty.  I don't know what we'll do.  There are a few more doctors we can go to in the area, who is right for us, do we want to subject ourselves to more doctors, or just go for the money shot and do IVF, or just plain old say screw it?

Piece of My Heart

I've been avoiding Facebook like the black plague.  It seems every time I log in a new announcement is made.  I love that my friends are expecting, it's awesome!  I love that they have the joy of expecting/welcoming a child, but I can't be jump up and down joyful, really it kills me. It twists the knife in my heart a little more.  I smile and say congrats, then go to my corner and that is all she wrote.  I used to go out and buy a little something for the expecting parents, I now avoid the baby section of any store at all costs.  Therapists say this is normal, I don't feel normal!  This is not me, I am not a person that avoids things!

Hey, Hey What Can I Do?

So what do you do when you do when you are in peak condition and then land flat on your face?  You get back up and deal with it.  I've watched too many people in my circles run from problems and learned at a young age that facing issues head on is better than looking back and trying to figure them out  (or fix the bigger problems that accumulated)later on.

You can't always get what you want.

Race recap from Saturday, final race of the Forge Trail Series.

Forge always puts on great races, heck I'm always happy to not be on the road running but I'll take what I can get. I came in expecting to finish strong knowing that I had a smidgen of a chance at an age group award. This race was a 10k through the Port Hudson civil war site. It was amazing last year, and didn't fail to upset this year.

For a little while

Things haven't changed too much on the home front.  Just another month.

Hurt

Sorry this is a sad post...

Life continues on.We are made too aware of that in the matters of those taken from us too soon, well before their time.  My life has been inundated with this at times, where it seems death is all that is around.

Maybe.

Where to begin...

AF showed up on Tuesday.  Not a big deal besides she's here once again, the big deal is this starts the timeline for intervention.  Like a good student I called the RE and scheduled my appt for Thursday to do an u/s.  I broke down at home because in all of my life I never imagined IUI being a route for us, who envisions not being able to get pregnant when you spend your entire life trying not to get pregnant?